Could anyone explain the algorithms behind these effects? ----------- Time distortion: Makes guitar solos seem longer. Can also be achieved by ineptitude. Blame shifter: Shifts the pitch of mistakes down one octave so that the audience thinks it was the bass player. Depander: Filters out popular cover songs. Overjive: Makes Hootie songs sound like Parliament. Active pickups: Amplifies "signals" sent to attractive audience members. Fluff box: Filters out excessive musical substance. Rehash: Stores and plays back your favorite riffs constantly and forever. Feedback Eliminator: Drowns out "constructive criticism." Band Pass Filter: Eliminates sexual advances between band members. Depressor: Changes any chord to E minor. Paralytic Equalizer: Makes you as good as other guitarists by injecting them with nerve toxins.